Broken
© LOOK, NO HANDS by DELAFOI
"I'm broken, darling." said the Thin Wild Duke. Then he got quiet. And before he spoke again, he thought of all the things he wanted to tell her.
I'm just broken. The puzzle I brought with me had this beautiful finale, but I kept pushing for the wrong pieces to fit, and I didn't make it in time. Now, it's too late. My room is a mess, and the gameboard hides under things that never belonged there. The cleaning lady could help, for sure, it would be all nice and tidy, but you stood beside me when the oracle spoke. "A minute's mistake is a lifetime's burden." And I have everything but a lifetime to spare. And even if I did find a way through this, there would still be breadcrumbs hiding in the corners as constant reminders of the choices I brought upon us. I'm just so tired of stepping in my old trails. I am tired of sinking deep into this pile of misplaced pieces that never fitted the board anyhow. I am sick of this mess.
“The truth is, I am broken, darling. Beyond repair.”
I know I'm lost in how all of this was supposed to be. I know it's harsh and self-destructive, I know all of it, but it isn't a choice anymore. It's everything. I'm compulsory doing all of life's necessities to avoid doing what's necessary. And this room, this life, won't let go of its grip. Instead, it drags me down with it, all the way to its darkest dungeons, keeping me there as a souvenir in its vast collection. I fear the unspeakable. Time was never anyone's mistress, but most certainly not mine. She blew the whistle long ago. I just refused to listen. The unspeakable is knocking on my door now. The match is lit, and all of this has to burn to make way for the beauty of life. Annihilate to cultivate; The brutal force of natural selection. I'm just unlucky to be on the wrong side of the fence.
Then the Thin Wild Duke looked at her, hiding his tears. He cleared his throat and said, "The truth is, I am broken, darling. Beyond repair."
